warm spots, pool, sunflowers

 * However hot the air in the house (I decided to skip replacing the AC this year), the floor is always cool, almost cold. So when I walk into a room and onto a hot or warm patch =Yipes! what is going on here? and all sorts of catastrophes swirl around in my head. Minutes later I figure out that one of the dogs has been sleeping there, creating a warm spot. And I relax back into my 'thinking of other things' mindedness.

* I began to swim when young. I did not use the word 'learn' there because the scenario was:"Here's the pool. There is no lifeguard. Have fun. Come home when you want food." On the inevitable school days I made sure my gills were hidden from view. I was a solitary swimmer, solitary person. The reason I mention all this is that what too often is happening with me nowadays reminds me of that first time I thrust down to touch the bottom at the deep end of the pool, having  tossed a shiny stone to the depths as incentive. Thrusting down was the easy part. On the upward trek I fought the weight of the water, ear pressure, lung bursting possibilities, a knowledge that I was in this upward scramble alone. Nowadays it seems the same. I am alone in the pool of life (did I really write that?), a solitary person pushing aside the forces of an insane world, nagging tapes of the past, caught in a Stephen King scenario all to a discordant sound track. The gem of this paragraph (and truly there is one)is that the "Here's the pool..", "This is a bike, figure it out yourself", "These are roller skates + the metal key.", "A sewing machine!",  solo figuring out the contortions of using yarn and needles chalked up successes which enable me to persevere now, at this time, in this indescribably challenging, as one of my favorite movie titles says,'...Mad...World'. That is the gem, the shinning glimmer.

* Better to describe the changing days minutely rather than broadly label as summer, etc. This is the time of sunflowers. Majestic, sturdy, bee attracting, prickly stalked, drought resistant, proud, sunflowers.